I l-o-v-e clothes. Love them! Dresses, jackets, leggings, skirts, tops, cardies, shoes. (Oooooh, s-h-o-e-s…) And I break a lot of rules because in my mum’s day, you got to forty and wore neat little coats and cardies, and abandoned fashion to the younger generation. Well, not any more!
Having said that, I think every woman of a certain age has to have what’s called a ‘mutton-o-meter’, built into their consciousness. That means not wearing clothes that really should be left to the younger generation (like my nieces), but picking out certain elements that do show that you haven’t lost the fashion plot, and still have that finger on the pulse, and can bring you right up to date and make you look fresh.
But I believe there are ways that every woman can look better in her clothes – and feel better in her skin.
Work on your posture…
The fastest way to lose five pounds and take off five years, for instance, is to stand up straight. I can remember going shopping with my mum and I’d sort of schlump when I was trying clothes on – and she’d narrow her eyes at me and give me such a look! With boobs (which I’m ‘blessed’ with), the temptation is to hunch to make them disappear, but I’ve studied the Alexander Technique in the past, which really helps with posture (and so does Yoga).
As part of the Alexander Technique training, you imagine being gently pulled up by a string attached to the top of the head – where the fontanelle is (which is the soft part of a baby’s skull). You feel your neck lengthening. The arms should be relaxed and heavy, but not so heavy they drag down the shoulders. Keep your back straight and your buttocks relaxed. (You don’t want them to stick out like a duck’s bum, or have a swayback). In a relaxed way, put your shoulders back – even if you’ve got boobs and you’re self-conscious about them – and open that chest. It not only looks better, but opens the throat and makes it easier to breathe properly.
I took up the Alexander Technique because I’d noticed on TV that my posture wasn’t great, and also because I was getting a lot of sore throats. The technique was devised by someone who’d actually lost his voice, and it’s fabulous for singers – Sting has been doing it for years – because it gives the voice more resonance. But very importantly, it also helps you to look much better in your clothes! (There are different Alexander Technique organisations in the UK but ATI – Alexander Technique International – is one of the leading ones; it’s at www.ati-net.com, or click here for the UK page.)
Learn how to walk…
I’m not suggesting that you really learn the ‘model walk’ – but I do think it’s fascinating to watch a video of Naomi Campbell slinking down the catwalk, just for fun, to see how the pros do it. Every woman can master the art of walking with ease and grace. What you have to be wary of is tipping forward. I also see people jogging who put down toe first, then heel, toe, heel – and that’s really tough on the hamstrings. Should be heel-toe, heel-toe, heel-toe – not clumpily, but s-m-o-o-t-h-l-y.
And make friends with your mirror…
When it comes to clothes, a full-length mirror is absolutely crucial. I will stand in front of the mirror and look at myself from different angles to see how combinations of clothes look on me (a little hand mirror can help, here, so you can see your rear view). It’s nice if you can have a friend come round and do this together – it’s always fun. Or several friends! Women have this tendency to put ourselves down, ‘oh, my bum’s so big’ – but a girlfriend will say, ‘oh, but look at that gorgeous waist!’ And maybe you should be playing up that gorgeous waist more, with what you wear…
Still: there are mirrors and mirrors. Some make you look far worse than in real life (and it defies belief that some shops actually have mirrors that make you look a stone heavier than you are? How do they sell anything?) Some mirrors, though, seem to make you look taller and slimmer than in real life. You know what? If that helps you to feel good about yourself, then get one of those. Take a look at yourself just before you go out of the door, in that flattering mirror, and that little confidence boost will make you stand a little taller, and smile. And that’s what other people notice.
Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest of them all? Well, if you stand up straight and walk tall, it really can be you…
